Monday, 15 September 2014

We B Pets

You all know this place - in America it's PetSmart and the UK equivalent is Pets at Home. They're essentially the same on both sides of the Atlantic, big pet warehouses with stack of rodent cages and walls of aquariums, though it must be said the British version doesn't look quite so industrial. We don't sell dogs and cats in them either - I got quite a turn the first time I walked through an American mall and found kittens playing in a window display.

Of course, to Smith and Jones, this isn't a pet store. It's more like one of those oriental supermarkets where you can pick out your own fish.

Friday, 12 September 2014

Parallel Lines

We're nearly home - there's just a road to cross and a trek down the hill before they get there. However, there may be a few stops along the way...

Monday, 8 September 2014

Perspective Fest

I'm quite proud of this sequence of the milk float going over the brow of the hill and descending into town. I find perspective really hard so I reserve it for special occasions.

Friday, 5 September 2014


OK, I'll stop slaughtering pheasants now - Smith and Jones have finally found their way back home. They're very lucky as these milk floats are rapidly vanishing from our streets. When I lived in Tunbridge Wells I'd always be able to tell when it was 4am in the morning, as I could always hear the whine of the float's electric motor and the merry jangling of the milk bottles as I lay awake in bed. Alas, the rise of plastic bottles from supermarkets has meant hardly anyone gets their milk delivered anymore.

Wednesday, 3 September 2014


Is this a comment on the slaughter of the First World War and the cheerfulness with which the Tommies went to their deaths? Or am I just fed up with the number of dead pheasants i see at the side of the road on my daily commute? You decide.

Monday, 1 September 2014


Pheasants are possibly the most stupid creatures on Earth, and they definitely have no idea what road safety is. I've never hit a pheasant on the road, but it's been a close run thing sometimes. I drive to work every day down rural B-roads in Kent and Sussex, and you quite often find yourself rounding a corner to find a dumb bird in the middle of the road, and when you swerve to avoid him he will walk deliberately into the path of your car.

How stupid are pheasants? I was cycling down a country lane once when I came across one next to a wooden fence. The pheasant ducked behind one end of the fence, walked behind it and then appeared at the other end. I got off my bike to say hello to it and it hid behind the fence again. When it reappeared at the other end, I was there waiting for it. Eeeek! It went behind the fence again, I walked back to the other end and the pheasant popped its head out once more. Repeat this sequence for half an hour. (To be honest, the pheasant is probably telling the same story to his friends, only he starts it with 'How stupid are cyclists?')