Millie Week 25, Mon 18 - Sat 23 February 1991

I wasn't one of those accident prone kids who spent their entire childhood with a different part of their anatomy in plaster every week. I think I broke my arm once in a freak climbing frame related accident at primary school. And the only other problem I had was a chipped patella when I was 12, which, once I'd finally persuaded everyone that I wasn't faking it by getting an X-ray done, meant my entire right leg ended up in plaster. I dredged up those childhood memories here.

Wednesday's strip brings to mind Spike Milligan's observation that any man left alone in a room with nothing but a tea cosy, who doesn't try it on as a hat when he thinks no-one is looking, has no soul.

Thursday's strip was suggested by the layout of my local hospital at the time, the Kent and Sussex hospital in Tunbridge wells. It was originally built in the early 30s, on a steeply sloping site, and got bits added onto it over the years. By the time we reached 1991 it was a labyrinth with corridors and wards going off at crazy angles on about eight different levels as it dribbled its way down the hill. It's just been replaced with a brand spanking new PFI hospital which has effectively bankrupted the local NHS trust. But that's by the by.

Friday's strip was inspired by once getting lost in that hospital and accidentally coming across the private dental wing. You could tell it was the private wing. There were shades on the lightbulbs, there was carpet on the floor, there were pictures on the walls, the furniture still had stuffing. Everything matched. I've got nothing against people who decide to go private - if they can afford it that's fine by me. But please, use your own buildings rather than NHS ones I've paid for with my taxes.