Nigh, I tell you! It's nigh!

No it isn't. Just because the Mayans need to buy a new calendar, it doesn't mean the world is coming to an end. It's a moot point anyway, the Mayans came to an end in the 8th and 9th centuries, so they overestimated the end of their civilization by about 1,200 year.

Scrumpy doesn't believe in the apocalypse either. He just recognises it as an easy way to make everyone else as miserable as him.