Pick pick pick

I used to live in a flat which had woodchip wallpaper - every dodgy builder's favorite decorating option as it tends to hide any defects in the wall with random nobblyness. All went well until two kittens called Smudge and Cholmondeley moved in and discovered quite how delightful the stuff was to use as a claw sharpener. In a few short weeks my walls went from nobbly to shaggy.

They grew out of it after a year, and it was surprisingly easy to train them to use a scratching post. But it still meant I had to redecorate two rooms.

Pedants will notice that the skirting board only appears in the first frame.

Wallpaper

...well, it always happens to me.

More DIY

It's the last bank holiday of the year - or rather, the last one until Christmas, when we make up for the dearth of state holidays by staying away from work for a week and a half.

Thus, it's the last chance to do any extended DIY before Easter. And it's my chance to bring out all the DIY gags that I wrote for last Easter but which had to be postponed to make way for everything that happened over the summer.

Paste

Having introduced the dandelions last week, how could I resist this? Some gags just assemble themselves.

DIY

DIY - Do-It-Yourself, something which blighted many Easter holidays in my youth. I'm no good at it myself - I'm a firm believer in GAMI: Get-A-Man-In.

Hot cross buns used to be special, only appearing at Easter, but now you can buy them all year round in supermarkets, usually piled high at supermarket entrances with a two packs for a pound offer. One a penny two a penny indeed.

Simnel cake is still definitely an Easter seasonal special. Which is just as well, as I think it's possibly the most disappointing cake in the world. (Marzipan - blee!).